I Want Mud in My Eyes

In John 9, there is a story about Jesus healing a man who was born blind. Jesus approached the man, spit into the dirt to make mud, then rubbed that mud onto the man's eyes. He then instructed the man to wash the mud off in Siloam. After the man did this, he was able to see.

On Monday I am leaving to go to Central America where I will spend the next 16 weeks. I don't know what to expect. I don't want to have expectations. 

I'm afraid. Though I honestly don't know what of. 

And I'm excited. I'm excited to be in a new place with new people. I'm excited to improve my Spanish. I'm excited to take Liberation Theology again. 

I was trying to decide what to title this blog which will be the place where I share my experiences in Central America. While thinking about what I hope to gain from my semester abroad, I realized that more than anything else, I want my eyes to be opened. And I want that even if that means that Jesus has to rub some mud in them first. I no longer want to be blind to the injustices around me. I don't want to be blind to the fact that my humanity is tied up with over 7 billion other human beings. I don't want to be blind to the ways in which I am an oppressor. 

It's funny that Jesus uses mud. It's as if he's showing us that, in some ways, it's probably easier to be blind. Or at least less dirty. But I've taken the clean, easy way out for a long time. So maybe some dirt is what I need to really change. To really have new eyes. 

"He replied, 'The man they call Jesus made some mud and put it on my eyes. He told me to go to Siloam and wash. So I went and washed, and then I could see.'" John 9:11